What I've learned from self help

 The serenity prayer. “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.” This to me means we shouldn't waste time worrying about things out of our control and should spend time discovering and changing what we do have control over. In my case, it does me no good to deny my accident and become frustrated and angry about what it took from me. It's true many things were taken from me, but for all the doors that closed others opened. I am grateful for all of the opportunities that have come into my life since the accident. There are certainly times when somber emotions come across my body and I simply surrender to them and let them run their course. This way I can get back to being my positive optimistic self as soon as possible. 

Time management. When it comes to time management having any fancy system can end up getting in the way more than helping. I simply have a checklist on my phone where I organize things from most important to least important. Not most important on that day, but most important for my future. Writing this blog, doing my podcast/audio journal, finishing school, and doing my physical therapy are some of the most important things to me right now. I always do those first then move on to others things. Ultimately I try to give whatever I am doing my full attention until I check it off the list. 

Helping others. What I believe therapy and self-help are trying to teach us is that everything is on us. Whether it’s our fault or not. We need to take responsibility for everything in our lives and not become its victim. Getting people to understand this simple truth would be the best help anyone could provide, but often it seems impossible to do. Even therapists can get people to understand this and it's their job. The best I can do without trying to be someone's therapist is to laugh, admire, and be present with whoever I interact with. I can also lead by example and share my experiences. 

Being present. Although my mom raised me to be very present I am always striving to be more mindful. Some ways I practice being present or mindful are meditation, self-reflection, and setting intentions. Being present in social situations helps us show the people we are with we care about them and it allows us to set aside our own anxieties and agendas to really listen to another person. 

Negative experiences can be the worst thing that happens to you or the best. the choice is yours. I could victimize myself because of the accident. I could complain, be angry and sad and people would understand. That would be ridiculous, bringing other people down because something terrible happened to me isn't fair to anyone. The other option is feeling gratitude for my family, friends and the new opportunities I now have. On top of this, the accident gives me a perspective on all of the joys of the world. without seeing the darkness we cant appreciate the light. 

Following the serenity prayer, managing our time, helping others, being present, and appreciating our negative experiences is what I have so far. Let me know if there's another point of self-help I missed in the comments below!