A Positive Story

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When I first broke my back I thought I was dreaming. Only about 3 days later did I realize that what had happened was real. At that point, I started to question why this had happened to me. I began to blame the people around me, I was angry. I didn’t know someone’s life could change forever just by going off a simple ski jump. I felt people should have warned me against it. As I began to sort out the accident and its meaning I came to a very powerful conclusion. 

To articulate the transformation of my beliefs I will use the Buddhist parable of the two arrows. The teaching is that there are two arrows that hit us in any negative situation. The first is part of life but the second is optional. The first arrow in my case was the accident. The second arrow was anger, blame, and the story I told myself. Unknowingly I was making my situation worse by trying to blame others and decide why this had happened to me.

Now I understand that we do not have to tell ourselves negative stories, and we can actually tell ourselves positive stories instead. I believe that the accident did not happen for a reason. It was simply just an accident. Knowing this makes me feel much more at ease. I believe that it is what I choose to do now that will give my accident meaning and purpose.

I ask “What I can do now that I wouldn’t have been able to do before”, or “How is this the best thing that has ever happened to me”. Questions like this allow me to reframe my accident in a positive light. They allow me to be proud rather than ashamed of what happened. 

The parable of the two arrows applies to every aspect of life. The first arrow is the fact. The second arrow is the story we make up about the fact. Whatever the story we tell ourselves happens to be. It becomes our truth. So why not tell yourself a positive story?