Rejuvenation

Over the past week, I have been feeling exhausted. Waves of grief have started to crash over me again. I’d been working for a number of weeks with the following idea in my head. If I can just get rid of everything that isn’t conducive to my two goals which are walking again and helping people I will be much better off. 

Specifically, I started cutting things like hanging out with friends and socializing with new people. Things that brought me joy and rejuvenation. I was sure I didn’t need them to keep working hard and have a good attitude. I was wrong. These activities are crucial to my ability to be creative and persevere. They are conducive to my goals of walking again and helping people. 

Why are they conducive? To discover this, I had to first feel what it was like without them. I am an extrovert, I get my energy from others. Without others, I have a hard time staying motivated to do things. Needless to say by isolating myself I felt drained. I have discovered that socializing is helpful because it not only gives me energy but an ability to connect and learn about how I can best help people. 

Socializing also helps my goal of walking. Sometimes I need to let my body relax a little (even though my legs never get tired) my upper body does. Also, most of my therapy is done with one or more people so knowing how to navigate a social situation to get myself the best care I can is crucial. 

There are still many things and activities I feel I am better off abstaining from that bring me joy. Things such as, watching movies alone, scrolling social media, and eating junk food are not and never will be conducive to my goals. 

Thankfully I now have a better understanding of the best ways I can recharge and how they help me physically, mentally, and emotionally. Don’t worry though I will still be working harder than you think I should ;)